“The real work of relationships is not occasional, or even daily: it is minute-to-minute. ‘In this triggered moment right now, which path am I going to take?’ Rather than being overridden by your history, you can stop, pause, and choose”

-Terry Real

Couples Therapy

Have a good relationship; Learn to be a good partner.

One minute you love your partner and wanna jump their bones. The next minute you are arguing and telling them you want a divorce because they didn’t put their dishes away. “When we are good, we are really good…but when we are bad….”, this is something I hear from couples often. Being relational is one of the hardest tasks about living. It requires an immense amount of work and skill (skills that you are not often taught yet expected to know). With the help of a therapist to witness, name, and support you in interrupting the patterns that are causing distress, you can improve your relationship.

  • When I ask any couple what they are coming to therapy for, their response is always “Communication”. Inability to communicate with your partner in a direct, compassionate and curious way is one of the many ways couples get caught in the weeds and continue creating and implementing destructive patterns that cause relationship tension. My job is to help bring awareness to your communication cycles, help you interrupt them, and offer you tools to communicate more effectively

  • Sex is one of those topics that can be quite fun at the start of the relationship but over time can evolve into a point of contention and turmoil. Whether it’s differences in desire, performance anxiety, sexual trauma, past or current experiences affecting sex and intimacy, I’m here to support you in fostering more intimacy and understanding of the sexual concerns impacting your relationship.

  • I understand that navigating different racial and or cultural backgrounds in a relationship can often be challenging. My goal is to support you in recognizing and addressing potential issues related to race, ethnicity, and or culture in order to strengthen your partnership and connection.

  • Rebuilding trust can often times feel insurmountable, always questioning whether or not you will truly be able to trust your partner after trust has been broken. My philosophy on trust is that in every relationship there is risk and my goal is to support you in navigating the risk that comes with any close relationship. Through dialogue and emotion focused work, I can support you in rebuilding trust, restoring open communication, and fostering genuine intimacy.

  • Maybe one of you is feeling ambivalent about the relationship, maybe both of you are feeling ambivalent but aren’t sure where to go and what to do to move forward. Navigating the crossroads of discernment and divorce can be emotionally overwhelming for couples. My goal is to support both of you in exploring the evolution of the relationship, and to get clarity on your wants and needs within the relationship. Should divorce and or separation become the chosen path, My goal is to help you with the process of decoupling in a way that limits hostility and promotes compassion and understanding.

  • I specifically work with couples who are wanting to explore opening their relationship. Perhaps you are confused about what an ethical open relationship can look like, maybe you’re worried about creating agreements and setting boundaries. I can help you to explore and build a landscape sturdy enough to support an open relationship and lead to relationship fulfillment.

  • Money & Sex. These are the two most common issues couples usually argue about, and if you’re (un)lucky, we can tackle both during the course of our therapy together. Most couples don’t come into a relationship thinking or talking about money narratives, money expectations, or money goals; money talks are often something that comes at a point in which effective communication has gone out the window and you’re now screaming about who is paying for what. I want to help you explore your psychology around money, your money narratives, and your expectations and goals within your partnership. My goal is to support you in being able to have the conversations around money in an effective way where each of you is feeling understood.